AhabanzaUrukundo

Niba wifuza ko urukundo rwawe n’umukunzi wawe ruramba, dore ibyo ukwiye kwitaho

Mu buzima umuntu yishimira gukunda kandi na we agakundwa. Iyo uri n’umukunzi wawe mwishimanye mwahuje urugwiro , biba bisa naho mwibereye mu yindi si. Ntakubabara, ntagahinda mbese ibyanyu biba ari umunezero gusa. Mu rukundo ruhebuje kandi rugera ku ndiba y’umutima, muhana impano, mugahana uturabo, mugaterurana, mugahekana, mukishima, mbese mumeze nk’abari mu bicu  aho mwatwawe n’umuyaga  uhuhera ukabazengurutsa mu munyenga w’ubudasa.

Muri iryo juru rito, wumva wahorana n’umukunzi wawe amanywa n’ijoro, mbese ntimusibe kubonana. Ugahora winyuza imbere y’inzu ye ngo urebe ko wamubona byibuze mu maso.  Yasohoka mu nzu ukihisha ngo atamenya ko wamucungaga. Niba mukorana mu kazi, ugakora umuteraho akajisho mwahuza amaso mukamwenyura. Mbese biba bisa naho mwarenze imbibi z’imibabaro y’iyi si.

Ariko nanone isura y’ibyiza mwari murimo ihinduka nk’igicu gikubye imvura, ndetse ijuru ryanyu rikaba nk’ukuzimu, ubusitani bukakubera ishyamba mu gihe rukundo rwanyu rujemo kidobya maze ibyo wabona nk’umucyo utuje, bikakubera nk’umwijima w’icura burindi.Ibyo bituma wibaza niba ibyo wabona byari inzozi, bikakuyobera.

Niba ufite umukunzi, uzirinde ntuzamuhemukire. Kandi n’iba ntawe, ariko wifuza kuzamugira ni ngombwa ngo umenye uko uzitwara maze urambane n’umukunzi wawe iteka n’iteka. Urubuga rwacu kandi rwanyu, imboni.rw uyu munsi  twifuje kubabwira ibya wakora kugira ngo urukundo rwanyu  rurambe, kandi ruzire icyasha.

Mukunde byukuri kandi byimbitse

Umubano mwiza  ni urufunguzo  rw’ibyishimo kandi umutima ufungutse umenagura inzugi z’umutima w’inangiye. Niba uri mu rukundo n’uwo wihebeye, mwereke ko ari mutarutwa kandi ntawamusimbura. Mukunde kandi umukundwakaze, bizatuma abona ko uri uw’ibihe byose.  Niba winjiye mu cyumba arimo we n’abandi, mwereke ko ariwe wa mbere wabonye mu bandi  benshi. Niba abyutse mu gitondo yambaye imyenda runaka, tuvuge agiye mu kazi, musekere kandi umwereke ko ari umugore w’igikundiro. Niba urikugenda iruhande rwe, hagarara umusome ku ijosi nubwo ntampamvu zaba zigaragara zihari zihambaye keretse kuba akuri iruhande gusa.

Tuma yumva ko ari mwiza cyane

Mu byukuri, abakobwa bifuza kumva ko ari beza kandi bakabyiyumvamo. Abagore n’abakobwa akenshi bakururwa cyane n’ibyo babone kuma televiziyo, mu binyamakuru,  kuri facebook n’ahandi hose hababereka ibyiza bagura ni byo bahaha by’akataraboneka.” Kugira ngo bagaragare neza” bakenera kwishyira hamwe” kandi bakagaragara neza”.  Abenshi bashakira ubwiza mu kwambara neza kusiga makeup, kwambara imiringa ihenze n’ibindi.

Ariko nanone, makeup, imitako,imiringa, ndetse n’imyambaro ihenze sibyo byatuma uba mwiza, mu gihe wowe utiyumvamo ubwo bwiza. Burya iyo wumva uri mwiza kandi ubwiza bwawe buhambaye, uba uri mwiza. Biroroshye. Mu gihe ufite umukunzi, ni byiza ko umwereka ko ari mwiza kandi nawe akambyiyumvamo.

Tuma umukunzi wawe yumva atekanye

Muri kamera yabo, abakobwa bakunda gufatwa, nko kuba amaboko azengurutse ku ntugo ‘umufumbase’. Gutemberana n’umuntu runaka bari kumwe, kugira umuntu ubitaho, gukunda umuntu ubahesha icyubahiro.  Abakobwa kandi bakunda kumenya niba baduhagije, bityo ntakujya ahandi ushakisha uwabasimbura.

Abakobwa kandi bakunda kumva bakwisanzura bakavuga ikiri ku mutima. Niba umukunzi wawe yifuza kukuganiriza akari kumutima, mwumve, kandi wumve neza n’icyo ashaka kukubwira. Mu byukuri si icyo ari kuvuga ahubwo wite ku mpamvu.

 Gerageza kumwereka ko ari uwingezi

Hari ibintu byinshi muri iyi si tuba dukeneye kwitaho kandi biba ari ingenzi cyane  mu mibereho yacu. Dukenera gukora akazi , dukenera imyambaro, gushakisha amafaranga,kwita ku miryango, gusabana n’inshuti ndetse no gushaka uburyo twazabaho neza ejo hazaza.

Tugira inzozi nyinshi zo gukora ibkorwa by’indashyikirwa, tugashakisha ubuzima bwiza uko bwije n’uko bukeye. Gusa mu buzima hari ubwo bigenda uko tutabikekaga, tukababara, tugahangayika, inshuti zikaducikaho, bigasa naho ijuru rikugwiriye, ukibaza niba ari wowe bikakuyobera. Ntubashe gutora agatotsi ijoro ryose.

Mu gihe ibyo byose bikubayeho, umukunzi wawe aba ari hafi yawe,akwitayeho akumwenyurira, ntakibi yifuza ko cyakugeraho . Ahubwo iteka n’iteka ahora akwifuriza ibyiza gusa kuko agukunda, akakwitaho ndetse akifuza ko uhora wishimye.

Ni inshuti yawe ihambaye. Uramutse umubuze mu buzima bwawe, wabaho nabi. Wamukumbura mu gihe yagiye. Mbese ni we kintu cy’ingenzi cyane ukeneye mu isi yawe., bityo ntuzatume na rimwe urukundo rwanyu rutezuka na hato.

Mushimishe mu gihe muri gukora imibonano mpuza bitsina

Imibonano mpuzabitsina ni kimwe mu bintu bikomeye cyane hagati y’urukundo rwa babiri. Imibonano mpuza bitsina kandi  ni inkingi ya mwamba hagati y’abashakanye. Akenshi icyo gikorwa iyo kitagenda neza hagati y’abashakanye, usanga urugo rwabo rurangwamo umwiryane ndetse  benshi ntibasobanukirwe icyabiteye. “Ni ibanga ry’abakuru.”  Ni ngombwa ko ukora iyo bwabaga kugira ngo ushimishe umukunzi. Mu rwubake kandi rurambe.

Tuma umukunzi wawe aseka

Iyo umukunzi wawe atishimye burya haba hari byinshi biri ku mutima kandi bimubabaje. Ariko iyo asetse bimwibagiza byinshi yahuye nabyo. Ndetse agasagwa n’umunezera umwibagiza iby’agahinda. Kwishimana n’umukunzi wawe, burya si uko ufite ubutunzi bwinshi, ubwiza buhambaye cyangwa ikindi cyose. Ahubwo ni uko urukundo rwanyu ruhamye kandi rushinze imizi. Bityo rero ntugatume umukunzi wawe ababara ahubwo ujye uharanira iteka ko ahora aseka yishimye.

Hari icyo waba wifuza kumenya ku buryo bwimbitse, hari igitekerezo wa ufite cyangwa inyunganizi, kidusangize kugira ngo dukomeze twunguke ubumenyi.

Yanditswe na Ildephonse Ndisanze

 

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